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it took me a long time to figure out what God's voice is.
Mike is right, God is no respector of persons. He loves everyone, for our generation that means, Hitler, Charles manson, the world.
It's good to question what you have been taught. The Word says to do that, prove all things hold fast to that which is good.
And it doesn't say knock the bad, bad mouth the bad, it says to hold fast to that which is good. So you did the right thing to question. That's great.
Michael, here is what you wrote: any time i said anything like "god, if you want me to do such-and-such...," i never got a response.
God will never ever ever usurp our free will. That's why you didn't get an answer. God doesn't control us like robots, he gave you free will and he expects you to use your head. You asked amiss. No big deal,
When you ask God stuff say things like Jesus used to say, Show me, teach me, explain to me, remember you are not the boss, God is we are subservient to Him. You don't have to beg, or plead. Just ask, will you whow me this, can you teach me that? I don't get this, can you help me figure it out. See, that doesn't usurp your free will and it allows God to help you. Then, and this is where I have trouble, shut up and wait. If you ask, He is bound by His Word to answer, so you just wait knowing He will. And He will Michael. Just be still and let Him.
Tah,
Janis
and like i said to john, i'm happy for you if what you believe works for you. the truth is, i liked thinking i knew the absolute truth. i liked the certainty of it. but for me, it came at too high a price: i had to turn off a hunk of my brain to go along with so much of what the bible says. then, in 1987, when i had to turn that part of my brain back on to deal with certain questions that came up in those days, i realized i liked it better on than off. so i left it on.
this isn't a criticism of people who choose to believe. it's just about what I had to do to be honest with myself. like i said, if it works for you, i'm happy for you!
maybe one of these days i'll take you up on those beers and blues.
thanks for taking the time to write.
i responded to your post, but it seems to have disappeared.
anyway, thanks for all you said. and i agree--especially about life not being so cut and dried. i remember one of the first things i decided when i got out of the way was to allow people the freedom to believe what they believe: "if it works for you, i'm happy for you." and after more than 20 years out, that's still pretty much where i'm at. of course, i've had a lot of time to solidify my position on things, so maybe i'm just a tiny bit less open-minded about it.
Dittos to what John said...
Though you and I never really hung out together in residence, I do remember one thing, at least for me, that really stood out about you.....your boldness and passion, on Corps night, to jump up, when called on, to speak out a Corps retemory. I was extremely shy to do anything in a large crowd, let alone 1000 believers. I was fortunate if I could remember the words to a song when I played before the Corps at just a campfire or afterglow.
Since I left TWI in 1988 I've been involved with "no" ministries, numerous ministries, numerous churches, been exposed to folks from different religions, etc. I've scrutinized and questioned every single premise and tenant which I have been taught or read. In times of doubt and discouragement, in times of strong faith and encouragement, in the good times and in the bad times, one thing has never changed.....and that is when I speak, pray, or sing in tongues, I am touched by and ministered to by my heavenly Father in a way that no drug, person, emotion, imagery, preaching, teaching, sexual experience, yada yada yada can compare...a supernatural in-filling of His presence, love, and joy that says "I love you my child, and will always love you and care for you....no matter what." It reminds me of Romans 8:16...that I am a child of the living God. To date, the single most life-changing experience in my life, was the night I was sitting in my 68 Camaro, and I said to God, "If this speaking in tongues thing is for real and it's your will for me to do it, then when I look up at the moon I want to have it and know it. As soon as I looked up at the moon, I was filled to overflowing.....with a reality that was so beyond and more powerful than any heroin, lsd, mda, crystal meth, marijuana, or sexual phenomenon, that I had ever experienced. This went on all evening, and all night...revolutionized my life. To this day, that reality is still what anchors my spirit, soul, mind, emotions to the "one" "true" God whom I love with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength...or at least endeavor to...even when I feel like shit, and it seems that things have turned to shit.
This past weekend I went for a Harley ride with two of my old high school buddies with whom we were heavily into LSD, MDA, Mescaline, Psilocybin, Crystal Meth, Heroin, marahoochee, and just about everything else we could get our hands on. One of these guys I hadn't seen since 1981...well, seeing where they were, and where my life is, I couldn't help but be thankful for the deliverance He wrought in my life.
I am not writing any of this Michael, to be critical or contentious in any way...I am so into pursuing things that make for peace and encouragement...mainly I guess I am writing to tell you that I love you brother...and respect your honesty. I'll take honesty any day over facade, veneer, deceitfulness, hypocrisy, etc.
I wish you lived nearby so we could have some cold ones and play us some "muddy waters" kinds of blues! happy blues!
I love you man...would love to hear from you, and more about your life.
George
Not sure I would call myself an ex-christian, but I definitely have retained very little of what we were taught in TWI. My re-researching what we were taught, how scripture compares/fits with other belief systems and seeing documentaries such as "Banned from the Bible" has provided a much different perspective, if you will, of scripture, christianity and religion.
The world is, imo, much less black & white than what we were taught and I appreciate the shades of gray so much more now.
Don't worry about it being "unpopular", man. You are a good person and are just as welcome here as the next person. Truth be told, each person on here probably has a different viewpoint on many issues including Christians and non Christians.
Coming from a background of our experiences in The Way it is not unusual for some to struggle with what they should believe. We stayed in The Way Ministry until 2000. My wife was involved since she was 16! Most of our adult lives have been spent in the thick of "the ministry".
We are still stepping back. Still re-evaluating. Still sifting through what we feel was right and what was obviously dead wrong.
It sometimes takes years. People go through differen stages at different times. This is not a simple experience to go through but indeed a complex one in my opinion.
I am not sure I know what to call myself at this point. However I am at the point where I will never separate all people into either a believer or and unbeliever. I do not believe life is so cut and dried. Nor do I believe the man above would have us to be so narrow minded.
But the single biggest thing I have learned from it all is not to be critical of other people or their so called "belief systems". I have learned to kind to people and to treat them with the dignity and respect they deserve as human beings. I learned this from seeing the negative results and the carnage left behind in the lives of those who were not treated this way.
thanks for taking the time to write.
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