Blog or Article?
Blogs often focus on personal opinion, experiences, views, anecdotes or advice. Blogs tend to have a relaxed and conversational feel, such as in storytelling and are generally 300-500 words.
Articles aim to deliver well-researched, informative content with solid evidence to back up the points made. Articles are usually more formal, organized and frequently range 500-1000 words.
(Since X-mas 2010 is 2 months away, I thot I wud post last year's letter. My x-mas blog following is growing. I think there might be 2 of you now. Thank you, and Merry Christmas just any old time. Luv, m)
December 2009
Felix Navidad,
I’m Felix the Cat, the Wonderful Wonderful Cat. My friends call me Felix or Flea for short, and people who don’t know me usually just say, “Hello Kitty.” This has happened so often that I started my own company. You may have heard of it. It is my assignment this year to write the Shirley Christmas tail. It should come as a relief to you since hair-brained Harry wrote it last year.
President Obama and I have a few things in common. We are both black, although I am not an African American. I am simply American. My heritage is also sketchy, but I do know my mother was an unwed mother, just like Obama’s. Unfortunately, my mother was homeless, and I ended up at the pound where my family chose me because something just clicked between us right away.
Not so with the dog. He is a constant annoyance, sniffing me every single time we pass like I might smell different after 14 years. I think he just forgets how I smell no matter how many times he reminds himself. He probably doesn’t even remember that he’s sniffed me before.
Last Christmas Harry referred to me as a “dirty hairball.” Well, genius, you, sir, are the one with poodle hair while I have fur. And folks, would you rather hug a hairball or a furball? I personally hock up hairballs. Harry is a walking dirtbag. They named a hand-held vac after him. I bathe myself every single day, but he thinks he smells great. Harry lives for disgusting smells. At 14 he’s nearly blind, deaf and has always been dumb, but his nose, on the other hand, just keeps on sniffing. And if winning was about how much you smell, Harry would win hands down. Why, just his breath is blinding. I’m not complaining. His addiction to bad smells keeps me alive (along with my uncanny ability to land on my feet and my nine lives.) I’m the only outdoor cat in the neighborhood because the coyotes have eaten all the others. When I want to go outside I throw Harry out the door first. He goes bumbling along, nose to the ground, and at a distance could be mistaken for a mutated white rabbit. The coyotes start licking their chops. Meanwhile I slip out, black like me, and slip into the shadows. By the time the coyotes have figured out that Harry is so disgusting they would get food poisoning if they managed to choke him down, I’ve caught my dinner and am in the dining room safe and sound.
Dogs truly are the inferior species. Harry is so dumb he doesn’t know he’s supposed to obey commands, and I’m so smart I know I don’t want to. Also, dogs age much faster than cats plus they only have one life compared to our nine. Harry got sick this year so I gave him one of my lives. That’s because I’m Felix the Lionhearted. I figured he earned it by diverting the coyotes for me. I almost never get sick, but if I do I call my friend the Itch Doctor and he tells me what to do.
But enough about the flea circus. Let’s talk about me. I am a devoted member of the Mickey Mouse Club because I’m passionate about mice. I’m also passionate about catfish (heck they’re all cat fish!), catnip, catnaps, bird watching, fishing, and recently Twittering. I love to play Cat and Mouse. My favorite drink is a Cat-a-tonic. My best friend? Man-doo. Cat Man-doo. On Halloween I always go as a Black Panther. Pink Panthers are just plain pussies. Did I mention I was engaged to Cat Woman. But she dumped me after she found out I ate Batman. He was hard to catch but was purrfect with a side of fish sticks and a catnip kicker. I love musical theater and once played Tevya in “Fiddler On a Hot Tin Roof.” I also had a roll in “Cats.” Duh. If you ever see it, I am the cat in the hat. The only time I was employed I worked in an office as a copy cat. I worked for Chairman Meow. Favorite movies are The Aristocats, Moby Dick and Finding Nemo. I read a lot of cat-a-logs.
Harry lives in the doghouse and I live in the cathouse. Ask any man where he would rather live. I continue to share my cathouse with the fam. Not much to say about them except that their new reality TV show will air this fall called “Surely, It’s the Shirleys.” Bryce is opening up his own law practice January 4, 2010. He got hair plugs for the show and will portray his true inner self, a dragon slayer who saves the world from real estate mega disasters which is, of course, a little late. Marilyn, the mermaid queen, will be his office manager who socializes with the royalty of the OC to bring in big clients. She got big fish lips like all the movie stars do these days. Bobby is still an accountant at UCI, and may help Bryce with the business side of the practice, cooking the books. He will play his real self which is a fast-talking schmoozer/gunslinger, popular around the Hollywood jet set in order to cash in on their peccadilloes. Jimmy graduates from law school this May. He is contemplating practicing with Bryce which would make for a catchy firm name of Shirley, Shirley & Shirley. On the show, Jimmy will represent Bobby after Bobby shoots his first outlaw. Jimmy plays his true self on the show, which is of course a geddi knight. Jimmy prosecutes evil dark lords and sends them to Guantanamo Bay. That leaves the lovely Emma, a freshman at UCI, who will play her true self, a forest wood nymph who speaks a strange tongue and wears beautiful gauzy but torn dresses to glam up the show. She does battle with balrogs and such, slays them by speaking mystical stuff and emerges from battle disheveled but beautiful The series will also showcase family hobbies like hot air ballooning in which Harry will really get in the basket and fall out somewhere between here and Idaho. In this show we will never see him again. (I wrote that script.) Frodo comes over now and then, and they all play baseball with the vampire family down the street. On one episode the family cans jellyfish after a day at sea. I, of course, am the producer and director. If you would like to be on the show, just come by the house and the cameras will be rolling. We will all soon be celebrities crashing White House parties.
On behalf of the family, I would like to wish you catfish and catnaps and warm woolen mittens; snow balls, no hairballs and darling black kittens. Wild fish that fly and some birds on their wings; these are a few of my favorite things. We also wish you a merry Christmas, a figgy pudding, wonder and joy and heavenly peace.
Love,
Your friend, Felix
You need to be a member of Way Corps Site to add comments!
Comments